Whats the big deal with boobs?

***May contain information not appropriate for children's or husband's eyes.

I have never understood the big deal about boobs. I've never had them. I've always wanted them, but never could afford to purchase my very own pair. I just assumed I would never have them. Then I had kids. And bam! There they are. The unfortunate thing about it is, they aren't really mine. There is a baby telling me what to do with them when, and quite frankly I'm a bit disappointed! I am so glad that I am able to nurse my children, and thankful for that opportunity, as I know not everyone is able to. But this whole process is puzzling. Those of you who have been through this experience can probably relate. I am never quite sure if the kid has really gotten enough to eat. I'm trying to get him on somewhat of a schedule, as it won't work with my schedule to nurse on demand. My boobs don't want to cooperate. One day they feel like they are going to explode, and the next I'm not sure if there is enough in there to take care of business. Then one day he is a ravenous eater and can't get enough, the next barely interested in nursing on one side per feeding, much less relieve the pressure on the other side. This only confuses the boobs and the owner of the boobs more. I know things will work themselves out and that the boobs will adjust, as will Miles, as will I. But seriously, these things are supposed to be sexy? How does that work when they are so complicated? I would be much easier if chins were sexy. They don't seem to change too much over time. Or maybe hands. Oh well. . .what can you do?