Ok, so this could be a touchy topic for people, and I encourage you to comment if you wish, but also recommend that you not read the following entry if you are either vehemently feminist or extreme on the opposite end of the spectrum. That forewarning being said, we delve into touchy issues that may upset anyone that might read this post.
So, I was driving home from work, and happened to be listening to Moody radio, which I both enjoy and question on a regular basis. Today's topic, at the time of my drive, was that of submission to your husband. This is a topic that can be delicate for many women, and I am one of those. I don't know if it is my upbringing or my liberal arts college degree, but something gets me every time I listen to a sermon, speech, radio show, basically anything that talks about a woman's role being to submit to her husband. I also struggle with the position that it is a woman's role to submit to her husband in all things, and that their is joy in total obedience to this way of life. I feel that marriage is an equal partnership, and that we both give and take on a regular basis.
The thing that got me the most about this particular discussion was the topic of a woman's role of submission to her husband's sexual requests. The speakers emphasized a woman's role physically to be submitting to her husband despite her emotional state or level of energy. I guess I just plain disagree that a woman should put out whenever her husband wants it because it is their role to submit to their husband. I do realize that there are times when one must compromise their immediate wants and desires to give to someone else, but I find it highly disturbing to think that a woman should think of themselves as merely an avenue for their husband's needs. Am I selfish? Too forward thinking? Am I flat out wrong? I don't know. I suppose in an ideal world, if a woman was always willing to submit themselves physically then a good husband would be respectful of their needs as well, and perhaps not push at a difficult time for them. They just focused on the fact that a woman's body is not her own and that if it is truly God's, than this is the way to live. Every fiber of my being says that this can't be right.
So, thats my crazy rambling vent. Sorry if I offend, but I just get very frustrated when I think that a woman is most of all a means of sexual gratification for her husband.
2 comments:
Sam, I completely agree with you on this topic. Also, I think the word "submit" plays with our minds and shuts us off to what ever comes next. I think that sermon you were listening to was very one sided. Why, then should a man not give to his wife physically all the time too? And, I know not all men do when they aren't in the mood to "submit" themselves.
I'm just trying to picture this being said in a church and find it hard to see women shaking their heads in agreement. I actually see a lot of dirty looks and some heated debate on the car ride home!
If you are offered any more insight, please share!
I'm probably a little more of a feminist than I would like to admit...I'll blame that on my state school literary education, since you did. :o)
The idea of submission has always been tough for me too. I don't think God makes all women the same--some of us are stronger personalities and submission takes every ounce of our beings. This is me. Probably you too! If I was to submit to my husband's sexual needs whenever he wanted, you better believe I would expect some things in return. And I think a lot of male preachers have a hard time thinking of what men should do for their wives since they are not "called" to submit to them.
I don't know...I think that my needs are just as important as his needs...and so there.
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